SH*T News of the Day: Aftermath in Pakistan after losing to India in CT 2017

Minnows Pakistan were jolted by the Indian top order in yesterday’s game. After having lost their five previous encounters against India, Pakistan fans have finally admitted that the two sixes hit by Shahid Afridi are history and can’t be bragged about forever.

For the starters, various demands have been put forward by the Pakistan fans ahead of the Pakistan Cricket Board (PCB). Firstly, they want Misbah-ul-Haq and Afridi back in the team with immediate effect to make sure they’ve someone to blame upon for Pakistan’s losses. Secondly, they have demanded money to watch Pakistan games and support team in fan wars as they’ve faced too much humiliation.

Shoaib Akhtar is soon expected to roast the Pakistan team. He was quoted as calling Wahab Riaz a ‘water tanker’. There have also been reports of Ashok Dinda and Ishant Sharma having a secret meeting with Riaz before the game against India.

To boost the morale of some Pakistani cricketers for the remainder of the Champions Trophy, stand up commentator cum comedian Ramiz Raja has been told to do a session for the team. When SH*T News asked him, he confirmed it and also mentioned that he was looking forward to having a gang bang with the youngsters.

Umar Akmal was seriously pissed off with the likes of Wahab Riaz and Mohammad Amir failing to bowl their quota owing to fitness issues. He told, ‘Un mein aisa kya jo mujh mein nahi?’. Meanwhile Former Pakistani player Moin Khan was found gambling in a casino. When asked about Pakistan’s chances in the Champions Trophy, he told they looked as bleak as his chances of winning a jackpot.

Reportedly, Mickey Arthur gave the whole Pakistan team homework after their loss to India. Apparently, none of the Pakistani players have submitted it and there’s a great chance that Arthur himself will have to walk in the field against South Africa, the team he choked, sorry we meant coached.

Stay tuned for more updates from SH*T news.

Disclaimer: All the characters, story, content is work of fiction and meant for entertainment purpose only.