Steve Harmison makes some stunning revelations in his autobiography

Steve Harmison was one of the most deadly bowlers when he was at his best. His high arm action made him even harder to play and the batters had a hard time coping up with his pace. Harmison was even number one in the bowling charts back in the day. In 2004, he was at his peak when it came to his cricketing career.

However, Steve Harmison has made some stunning revelation in his autobiography “Speed Demons”. He has talked about things which made him a lesser human being and troubled him throughout his career. Some of these revelations are gut-wrenching as they tell us what the former England fast bowler has been through.

He has called his depression as the “demons” which used to haunt him during his away trips and tours. However, he later revealed that it was increasing and also thought about ceasing his existence. This was something which fans were unaware of and his autobiography has done that thing.

The depression

Harmison said that he was the best bowler in Test cricket on the planet in 2004, still, he was in no position to celebrate and he even contemplated suicide. The feeling that someone has taken over him was coming back to him more than before and it was unbearable for the big guy.

The former pacer said, “Fast forward to the great summer of 2004 when I was number one in the rankings for the Test bowlers. It was the same story only worse. I was in no position to celebrate. I was in no state to do anything. England won all seven Tests but as that summer went on I could feel the brightness growing darker.”

“The horrible truth was those same feelings, which had consumed me on trips abroad, were overpowering me again — and this time it had nothing to do with being away from home. The demons had not bothered to travel. They had come to get me at home, in the middle of a very successful English summer,” he added.

Seeking help

Harmison tried to seek help from the England team doctor and also saw a psychologist. The question that haunted him the most was the one where the doctor asked him about hurting himself. Those were some of the darkest moments in Steve Harmison’s career.

“I spoke to the England team doctor Peter Gregory and saw a psychologist. I was asked: “Have you ever considered harming yourself? That frightened the hell out of me. It was clear I was clinically depressed and medication would be the way forward. I’ve been on it ever since,” Harmison revealed.